011 Releasing the Fire of Desire


011 Girl on FireAs 2012 closes and life transforms into a new year many of us have begun defining some resolutions. You know the ones – hit the gym twice a week, lose 30 pounds, save more, spend less, recycle. Goal planning and intention setting is usually focused on a tangible outcome, a result. What if we have this all wrong?

The hardest question I have EVER been asked is What do you want? It’s taken me several years to come to terms with it actually. It’s always been a heck of a lot easier to pin point what I don’t want…debt, abusive relationships, stress, excess weight (both physical and mental). But to identify what I really want keeps coming back to one word…happiness. And where, how, when is happiness found? This is where the real work comes in.

Danielle LaPorte recently published The Desire Map which takes a good hard look at what she calls “the most creative force in the universe” desire. Desire pulls at us, taunts us, calls for us to reach for it. When desire is healthy and is not rooted in obsession, it creates powerful feelings without specific attachments. For example, when we seek more clarity in our lives it can manifest in more than just one goal. It could result in a change in career, more communication in relationships and stronger self esteem. When we desire a feeling of affluence we may find it by raising relief for those devastated by hurricane Sandy or running into a neighbor at Starbucks and treating him to a cup of coffee.

“What you seek is seeking you.” – Rumi

There’s a fire inside each of us. It feeds our desires and needs tending to keep it ablaze. We can toss in random debris and it will surely continue to sporadically burn, but it may also spit out sparks of incompatibility and neglect. When we energize and nourish it with the kindling of inspiration, trustworthy relationships and healthy, long-burning experiences we create an opening, a release of unexpected results. When we seek the feeling rather than the attachment it’s much easier to say yes to what evokes the desired feeling and let go of what does not.

If desire is our heart saying yes, release is our soul saying no.